Officer Cynical: Sees All, Knows All

I used to see this vanity plate "BGDMMY" driving around my beat all the time. I finally ran the plate just to see who it was. A few days later, I get dispatched to a vehicle vandalism call. I recognize the complainant's name in the run as the registered owner of "BGDMMY".

I get to his apartment, and the first thing I say is, "Hey, I know you. You're BGDMMY." The guy's jaw drops open: "How in the hell did you know that?!" And I say, "I'm the cops. I know everything."

The guy acted like I was Wizard of Oz for the rest of the call.