Friday, April 3, 2015

You're Gonna Need A Bigger Boat

I stop a guy for driving with a revoked license. He has no insurance on the car, so I impound it.

Officer Cynical: "I would suggest you take anything valuable out of the car before the tow truck gets here."

Mr. Foyt: "I have some tools in there."

Officer Cynical: "Fine. Go ahead and get them. Will you be able to walk home with them or do you want a ride?"

Mr. Foyt: "If you could give me a ride, that would be great."

Officer Cynical: "No problem. Get your tools and we'll go."

Mr. Foyt proceeds to stack 2 large tool boxes full of tools, a gigantic suitcase full of clothes, two pairs of mud-caked work boots, a set of PGA tour-worthy golf clubs, and - I kid you not - a full-sized 2-ton floor jack on the side of the road.

Officer Cynical: "This isn't exactly what I had in mind. There's no room in the trunk, and you'll never get all that stuff in the back seat. Have you got a friend you can call to help you move it?"

Mr. Foyt: "Yeah, I'll call him right now."

As the tow truck is hauling off his car and I'm driving away, Mr. Foyt's friend shows up. On his motorcycle.


Valentina Catini said...

Really good! It is hilarious.

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Anonymous said...

good thing i wasn't drinking my coffee when reading the last line.
so did you give him a ride eventually?

Anonymous said...

living in his car....mud means he was trying to work at least..

Anonymous said...

Just wanted to say I came over from Dr. Grumpy's blog, and read your entire site in one sitting. Just bookmarked you, and look forward to reading! I have the utmost respect for law enforcement and your ability to maintain decorum while dealing with the utter stupidity you see on a daily basis (thank you for that).

Arzt4Empfaenger said...

The last line was the icing on the cake. Priceless, I laughed so much. XD After I facepalmed.

Jay said...

Guess they're going to make a couple of trips then. ;-)