If you're a grown man, who votes and can buy liquor and has kids and a mortgage and a real job and everything, here are some things you might want to avoid doing, so you don't look like an idiot:
- Riding a 20-inch bike, so that your knees go up to about eye level when you pedal.
- Wearing the hair on any part of your body braided or in a pony tail.
- Raising your fist with your index and little fingers extended, and hollering "Whoooooooooooooo!" at any gathering of any kind for any reason.
- Burning rubber when the light turns green.
- Faking being a military veteran when there's any chance whatsoever that you're talking to one. Or any other time, for that matter.
- Getting into a physical domestic with your wife or girlfriend, then telling the cops that she hit you first and you were defending yourself when you gave her a fat lip.
- Getting drunk and disorderly in public, especially when you're out alone.
- Vandalizing anything that belongs to someone else to get back at them for something.
- Getting into a neighbor dispute with anyone over the age of 80.
- Unless you're at the pool or on the beach, walking around in public without a shirt on.
- Wearing a baseball cap with the brim at any orientation other than straight ahead.
- Dating someone not old enough to drink legally.
- Getting something pierced.
3 comments:
You've apparently met my brother-in-law. Congrats.
- Do not get caught on camera chest-bumping, high-five-ing and hugging Jerry Jones at the end of the Dallas game.
Is it OK for a grown woman to do a burn out when the light turns green?
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