Monday, February 22, 2016

People In TV Commercials For Whom I Would Buy 1-Way Tickets To The Sun

Flo
Those 2 dipshits sitting in the car at Sonic
The Popeyes "chef"
The AFLAC duck
Ellen DeGeneres
Anyone who sings off-key on purpose
Strunk White, Idiot Weatherman
Everyone bitching that their car insurance rates went up because they wrecked their cars.
Matthew McConaughy
Ellen DeGeneres
Everyone touting farmersonly.com
All women talking about erectile dysfunction
The Mucinex mucus blob
The world's most interesting man
Ellen DeGeneres
The Australian-sounding guy selling everything
Peter Pan from GEICO (I would also punch him in the nuts before launch)
The Burger King king
The woman grinding calluses off her feet
Ellen DeGeneres
The reincarnation of Colonel Sanders

More GEICO camel, Robb Webb, and Maria Chudnovsky, though, please.

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

Just another reason I don't watch TV at all. But I get a similar reaction when I read the aerospace trade journals, particularly Aviation Week. Their over the top support for every wet dream by the big contractors give me nausea and The Urge to Kill...(not literally).

Anonymous said...

"Anyone who sings off-key on purpose"
-yes, especially children. This is NOT cute whatsoever

the Myrbetriq bladder
the disgusting, fungus-infested Jublia toe
the talking umbrella in the Ability commercials (no wonder you're experiencing a mental illness - you have a talking umbrella stalking you!)

awesomesauciness said...

Wait! I think you left Ellen DeGeneres off your list.

Anonymous said...

I did a spit take when I got to Peter Pan from GEICO! A shot to the balls seems to be the least this smarmy smartass should get.

Hildy said...

How about a most disgusting body part competition? I vote for the Xifaxan colon.

Old Fool said...

Any direct to consumer pharmaceutical add

People belly-aching that there auto insurance would not buy them a new car.

Anonymous said...

The Sonic Guys! YES!

Anonymous said...

My current vote would be in line with Hildy's - the talking colon. Wtf is that??? Sure, they gave it a sweet, innocent-looking face, as if it's the baby kitten of colons, but it creeps me out.

Anonymous said...

It seems your an Ellen fan?

sp77 said...

The farmersonly.com commercials drive me especially nuts. Ever notice that they don't have a single commercial featuring women seeking men? It's all overweight, beardy guys getting their pick of a selection of nubile Daisy Duke lookalikes.

Oh, and I especially love the one where the bitchy "city girl" gets DRAGGED BY A HORSE. Because if if a guy is disappointed by his date, she deserves a good horse-dragging?!?!