Bond. James Bond

You fell for the first e-mail from Somalia, and wired money to help the woman who said she needed it to come to the U.S.

Then, you fell for the second e-mail from Somalia, saying the woman had been kidnapped on her way to the U.S., and wired money to pay the ransom.

Now, you've gotten a third e-mail, asking for yet more money for airfare. She's even e-mailed you a copy of her passport, and you want me to confirm its validity.

It's hard for me to fathom why you never asked yourself why you, of all the people on the planet, were selected to solve this case of international intrigue.

But you have to believe me when I tell you I don't have the resources to run the passport number to see if it's real. You'll have to call the U.S. State Department. And no matter how many times you call me up and yell at me, and call my supervisor and complain, we're both going to tell you the same thing. Your money is gone, man. Gone.